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Just posting a journal to update. I haven't been on DA much because I haven't been doing very well. I've been... I guess the best description would be sick. Very sick. EDS stuff has not been treating me well... only to find out that I might have something else wrong with me too because EDS alone just does not fit the symptoms I've been having with my knees. I have been in agonizing pain and unable to walk for a week now today. I don't know what to do. This isn't letting up. I am not doing alright. I am very sick and I don't have a doctor that is willing to help me. I need help. My doctor wont even give me a prescription for pain medication anymore. Everyone is giving up on me. They either say I am a hopeless case and give up on me or outright refuse to treat me, or tell me that I must be faking it or at least, grossly overexaggerating because this just doesn't make sense. I need help.... I am very sick. I am in so much pain. I need to medicate myself to sleep. If there is anyone out there that can help me, please... if not, just know that I am not okay right now. I am not doing alright.

In other news, my little sister has been in and out of the hospital after trying to commit suicide.... my baby sister. She's only 11. She's home now and it is so hard to feel bad for her. It is so hard to be nice to her because she is the most selfish person I have ever known and since she stepped in that door she has done nothing but try and get everyone to fight and to hurt people as deeply as she can by saying the most hurtful things she can think up.

Life is hell. Somebody please save me. I'm desperate.